If you live your life in a non-emo non-depressing way or even if you come out of your room once in a blue moon to interact with your family, you've been a part of this sometimes lethal concoction. A barn is no different than any other life situation except that you have a bunch of know-it-alls who are right. No matter what. So what I'm saying is, it's 10 times worse than most situations you might encounter in every day life. Factor in the whole "self care" idea and you're playing with fire.
There are a million ways to skin a cat. There are also a million ways to brush your teeth, eat your cereal, walk your dog, drive your car, play uno with friends, change your fish's water, and get to the center of a tootsie pop. What I'm trying to say is, everyone does stuff with their horses differently. So when Fred sees Sally feed Tonto 2 scoops of 10% sweet feed mixed with rice bran, Fred tells Mary, Andrew, Eduardo and Victor how Tonto is starving and malnourished because he needs 12% pellet with alfalfa pellets. Since they think Tonto needs Vegetable oil, Red Cell, Beat Pulp, and 14% respectively, they agree that Tonto is going to die very soon and thus, drama ensues.
Besides feeding, other things that can cause issues are training styles. While the Western guys and the ladies who ride English tend not to make recommendations across disciplines, within saddle choice there are a lot of ideas buzzing around. Jerk this way, soft hands that way, kick now, wrap his tail up so he doesn't have to be embarrassed of that short thing, change the color of his bridle, turn right before turning left, rub his right ear three times, whatever you do, DON'T PUSH HIM!
Then of course, at a self care place, you run the risk of arguments over cleanliness. Rolling up hoses, sweeping aisles, how often one cleans their stall, untidy tack, stinky water buckets, and left wheelbarrows start a lot of problems. Then you've got those special people that think grooming needs to happen twice a day and your horse is abused because you skipped a day. Or you didn't put its blanket on or turn it out for at least 2.65 hours (which is of course, the scientifically determined amount of time a horse needs to be out in the sun per day. 4.32 hours in the winter. I hope you don't believe me).
Barn drama is best dealt with by caring what other people think of you and doing everything in your power to make everyone happy. Since that is a terrible way to live your life and you will end up making your horse colic trying to feed them off everyone's recommendations, my suggestion is to blow this idea off. The second best idea is to not voice your opinions. HA! That should be funnier to you than the first idea. We are all aware that animal people are the most outspoken breed of person on earth. We can, however, modify this approach to make it work. If you must put something into words, make sure those words are able to be summed up and repeated (by you) to the person of whom you have an opinion. Seriously. It works. Because seriously, it's going to be repeated in some way shape or form to that same person.
For the record, the absolute worst way (or two) to deal with barn drama is to internalize it (you'll only get more mad) or to pick a fight. I would never in a million years suggest to you to go up to a person at the barn and tell them they have an ugly pony, or their stall is too dirty, or their saddle is in the wrong place or their boots are the wrong brand. Definitely don't do that. But if you want to, film it. Please.
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| Keep grooming areas tidy to minimize grumpiness! |
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